Yeah, so probably not the best way to start off the new year, but it's what's happening, so... yeah.

I've been saying for the longest time that I "have to get a job soon" well the time has finally come.  I don't know what will happen if I DON'T get a job, so I don't want to risk it, as much as I fear I'll fuck it up, or I just don't want to do it, the consequences of not getting one will probably be a lot worse.  And who knows, maybe the fear is for nothing, maybe getting a job and being forced into a situation where I have to be more social and listen to orders and perform tasks under pressure will actually make me better instead of causing me to break down.  Maybe.

What does any of that have to do with anything though?  Well, I had a whole schedule planned out for this year, I was planning on releasing 76 videos during the year (mostly on youtube), but now that the job thing is imminent, I've decided to just scrap everything and focus on making what I want, when I want, which means I'll be working on more personal projects and just finishing up things that have been long overdue.  Mainly though, I will be focusing on bettering myself and getting over all of my mental bullshit, because it's really been getting in the way of making things.

As for why it took so long for this to finally happen, well, the thing that has been holding me back from getting a job for so long is having an expired ID, which costs $40 to renew.  Why did it take so long to get $40?  Mainly laziness.  How did I even get that money without a job?  I certainly didn't ask for it (okay I did a few times but ended up spending it on food and other things because at the time I couldn't actually use it for the ID for a few reasons but that's a story for another time).  Since February 2015, AKA, when this whole "needing to get a job" thing started, I've been using a website called Opinion Outpost, where you can take surveys for cash.  No it isn't a scam, you actually do get paid, I've made a decent bit of money from it in the last 3 years.  I wouldn't recommend it though unless you're really desperate or have nothing better to do.  I hate it so much, the surveys take forever and the pay is very little.  Sometimes you get lucky and get a fun, quick survey that pays a lot, but for the most part, it's awful.  This is part of the reason why now is the time to get a job, I'm fucking tired of taking surveys, it takes too much time and isn't worth it.  Even now that I have the money for my ID, I'll still have to take them until I get a job because I still need money for food.  But yeah, the main reason I have to get a job now, is just 'cause I've been living back with my mom and (now) step-dad for a year now, and I haven't contributed much monetarily (I've contributed a lot in other ways, and haven't got much appreciation for it, but whatever it's fine), so it's time for me to stop being useless and shit (also there were some threats but maybe I'll talk about that later).

But yeah, I wrote and recorded 3 separate update videos where I said all this, each time it got shorter and shorter, and I was not satisfied with either of them, or I once again changed my mind after making them.  I was gonna release the 2nd one, but it was rambly and was just really depressing, but it covered basically everything I've said up to this point.   Ultimately I released the 3rd one, a short, scripted update that just vaguely covers the situation, and I expanded on it in the comments.  I don't know why I didn't expand on my plans for the year in the video itself, I guess I forgot, or I just watned to get it over with, I don't know.

But yeah, now that things are different, what ARE my plans for this year?  Well, to keep my youtube channel from dying, I'll be streaming some animation and other stuff at least once a week, and I MIGHT upload one short a month if I feel like it.

My main project for the year though is Gripp, a 5 episode mini-series that deals with themes of depression, attempted suicide, and drug addiction.  Some if it is based off personal experiences, some of it is based off experiences of others, experiences I have either been a part of, or have observed.  It's serious and meaningful, but it's still got some comedic relief here and there, because of course I couldn't write something entirely serious.  I'm hoping to get it out by august, but with working on it while also working a job, I don't know how long it'll take to make.  The whole series is about 24 minutes long, so at the very least I'd estimate it'd take 8 months to make, based on past experiences, and that's working FULL TIME, so I don't know.  I've gotten feedback on the scripts from a few people though, and they've said it's good, so hopefully people like it.  I'll be sharing more details later when I actually have something to show.

In addition to that, there will also be a 12 episode live action series of skits that me and @RECONmasterFILMS wrote and (mostly) filmed last year.  We've still got 2 episodes to film and then we gotta put the whole thing together, but that'll be airing in the fall.  They're skits, but there is a loose storyline, and the finale is definitely different, so hopefully people like it.  I like it.

That's basically it I guess.  Sorry to disappoint everyone, but you know, sometimes in order to get ahead, you've just gotta give up.  Temporarily at least.