Glad to finally see that this is out! I remember converting it to video for you and wondering why you never uploaded it :p
Yeah, it's not as good as something you could do now, but it's still better than a lot of stuff you see posted online.
As for actual critiques, the animations pretty great for the most part, it's all smooth and dynamic, though some bits look pretty wonky, and there's even missing lipsync, though iirc that was due to time constraints.
The story is interesting, but feels really condensed and doesn't flow too well. There's quite a few pacing issues. That last shot is still as cool as the first time I saw it though.
Overall though, the concept is really cool and would definitely work well as something much longer with more time put into it. Once again, it's great to finally see this released, and I hope to see some more new stuff from you soon!
Wow it is you! That's amazing that you saw this. yes it has been quite a long time since I actually made this. I agree with you that it is a bit wonky and the pacing is... not satisfactory for me. These shortcomings almost stopped me from releasing it. but then i made a video about abandoning projects and I thought that I should follow my own advice. I'm sure that it was worth the few hours of extra effort to get it cleaned up and put out onto the internet, especially after all of that work i put into it. Thanks for helping me with it back in the day. Hope you are doing well!
I am SURPRISED at the amount of negativity this is getting, because this is an honest major improvement for you.
Story-wise, it's pretty okay. You just kinda jump into the action so there's no set-up, but there doesn't always have to be. The rivalry between Willie and Mudd Mann is pretty established at this point I think, so it's not like it needs to be re-established every time, but having some sort of buildup to the fight would definitely help with the pacing of this. After the fight, there's a cliff hanger. What exactly is it going to lead into? There's no telling, but it's sure to lead to something, and considering how much you've improved, I can't help but feel a little excited for more. I feel like the ending is a bit understated though, since it's so brief.
Animation-wise, this is an obvious major improvement over your previous stuff. It's actually animated and the frame by frame is pretty smooth, though it doesn't look that great since it's not properly timed. It's clear that you have some sort of understanding of how animation works though, so now it seems like you just need to work on your timing. The animation would definitely look a lot better with more correct timing.
The pacing is overall pretty bad. At some points it's really fast, which makes sense, because fights are fast-paced, but then a lot of the time it's just hanging on a single frame, and it just kinda ruins it. Then there's that brief bit of Willie standing in the beginning, and then Mudd Mann comes up. Willie's there for such a short moment that it just seems more like an error, but I'm going to assume it's just due to the bad pacing. If you time things out properly, everything will flow better and it'll be easier to understand what's going on.
Art-wise, Willie is drawn pretty well, so there's definitely improvement there. Mudd Mann doesn't seem to be drawn as well though, but it's pretty okay. There's a lot of proportion issues too, but that's not really too big of an issue, since sometimes that can have a good effect on the animation. The important thing is finding a balance between on and off-model animation though. The art style itself is almost appealing. The background art is simple, but it has a charm to it.
As for the music, it doesn't seem entirely fitting, but it works well enough. The music is almost TOO loud though, and it doesn't help that it's not high quality. It kinda hurts to listen to.
Overall, this was a major improvement over your previous stuff. You've clearly improved by actually animating things now, but you REALLY need to work on your pacing. Properly time things out, and everything should seem a LOT better.
This was pretty interesting. I will admit I had to watch it a few times to fully understand it, that's mostly because it went by so fast though.
The plot was simple, but it was entertaining and I can appreciate how you didn't need to rely on dialog to tell a story. It was portrayed well visually. However, I'm not entirely sure what happened in the end. Did the fan just not work, or was it just turning on very slowly and the guy was impatient? That wasn't quite clear.
The art style looks a bit too simple and could use some refinement, mainly character art, backgrounds were pretty decent though. The best thing artistically was probably the bus. There wasn't a lot of actual animation but what was there looked pretty decent. Adding more poses and inbetweens would help. The shot of the view looking up at the fan was pretty cool looking, and probably the most interesting shot in the entire short. The filters in this also really added to the visual appeal. They looked nice and never seemed unfitting to the scene, so good job with that.
As for audio, the sound effects all seemed fitting. The ambiance was nice and really added to it.
Overall, a decent piece. I enjoyed it, but some things could use some work. Good luck with your future works!
[Review Request Club]
You were right about the fan turning very slowly and not really doing anything to help the guy cool off.
Thank you for the thoughts, they're good to hear and think about. And thank you, review request club!
I will admit, at first I was like "what do I do?" and then I noticed the thingy in the corner said "get" and was a button, then the fun started ;3
It's a simple little gadget but there's a lot of words that could possibly pop up which leads to tons of interesting and hilarious combinations. There's been a couple of times when I've gotten the same phrase a few times in a row, but it doesn't seem like a bad thing since everything almost always goes together nicely.
The background graphics are simplistic, but there's a lot going on with them so that's good, and that mixed with the music and the spastic text gives it a chaotic feel, perhaps intentional as playing with fate can be a chaotic thing? ;3 The lightning and the water are probably the best effects there, nicely done with those.
The music is a bit loud though but hey, at least there's a mute button.
Not really much to say about this, it's a fun little gadget. Congrats on all the praise you're getting, it's well deserved with the work you've put in!
Oh gee, now Flappy Bird's on Newgrounds as well ;3
First of all, I have to say that the Mario music made me chuckle because those pipes look like they were ripped out of Super Mario World so it's very fitting and a nice stab at the original Flappy Bird.
Anyways, this is a nice adaptation of the game, though something you've done seems to have made it severely harder, it might be the speed that he falls or the arc or something, but it seems a lot harder to control him precisely. Nonetheless I did manage to get a score of 2 so it isn't unplayable, heh.
What I feel this needs is to use the scoreboard aspect of the Newgrounds API, since this is a game that relies on nothing but getting the "high" score. Being able to save your score and compare it to others probably would have added more re-playability, especially since people around here like to boast their stats. Some medals would have been nice too, like one for getting 10 points, etc.
You probably would have been better off making your own art and applying it to the mechanics of Flappy bird. That with the addition of medals and a scoreboard would have made this immensely better.
Seems you have potential as a game developer though. Hopefully you make something more original with more features next time. Good luck with your future games.
appreciate your response :) thank you!
Not that great
Really it seems like a work in progress right now, since you can't really do anything. The overall look of it isn't the best, and it doesn't have much functionality. When going into the control panel and clicking on the only thing you can click on, nothing happens. Since it's so limited, it probably shouldn't have been uploaded yet. When more options are available, then it might actually be enjoyable.
It is a work in progress
I really like this piece. Normally I don't review audio (mostly because I don't know much about music) so this might not be the most in-depth review. The song did sound nice though. The title is really fitting, as I can picture someone looking at their reflection and all the stuff that makes up their personality flies by them. All of it ending with them realizing what kind of person they are. The feel of the song really does give some cool visuals in my mind. I would totally like to see it used in an animation one day. You should upload more stuff, you have lots of talent.
Thank you for your review! I love hearing what others visualize, or think of when they hear music so this was awesome! Thanks again!
Simplistic, yet expressive.
It certainly is a cute and simple drawing. Pretty neat style as well. The sketchyness of the lines mixed with the two colors helps show the color and feel of the fur.
The eyes do look a bit too derpy though. One looks okay while the other is really sketchy. I think if they both looked similar it would look better. I'm also not sure what's going on with what I'm assuming is the mouth. I think it's smiling but yeah, not really sure :/
Still a nice piece though!
Thanks for the review mate, I'm obviously willing to admit it was rushed (for no discernible reason), so I'm glad you appreciated it as much as you did.
I don't know, it's like art or somethin'... :p
The comic book style works well again, like with your last piece I reviewed. Nice coloring and line quality. It's drawn pretty well and the hair has a nice amount of detail. The hair is probably the best part of this. The curves on her neck, chin, and cheeks look a bit awkward for some reason, as well as the squiggles under her eyes. Not really sure what's going on there. There's also something about her face that seems kinda manly... unless that's what you were going for, in which case good job :p
A decent piece. It's fun to look at and has a neat style.
Aw, thanks :D That was a long review, and that's how I like'em :)
I'm not sure if there's supposed to be any sort of message here, but it's a really nice piece.
It's pretty big so I'm glad you put a lot of little details into the trees and such. The silhouettes are good too. Everything adds up to a really nice, dark feel.
The only thing I see wrong with this is the texture on the field just doesn't seem right. it seems more like concrete rather than grass, other than that everything's fine... unless that's the look you were going for, in which case disregard that ;3
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